I heard the dumbest song I've ever heard in my entire life. It's by Sean Kingston, the pseudo-Jamaican, pre-pubescent rapper/singer who was featured in the Natasha Bedingfield song. Here is a sample of the lyrics.
We can go to the tropics
Sip pina coladas
Shorty I could take you there
Or we can go to the slums
Where killas get hung
Shorty I could take you there
Baby girl I know it's rough but come with me
We can take a trip to the hood
It's no problem girl it's my city
I could take you there
Little kid wit guns only 15
Roam in the streets up to no good
When gun shots just watch us, run quickly
I could show you where
As long you're with me
Baby you'll be alright
I'm known in the ghetto
Girl just stay by my side
Or we can leave the slums go to paradise
Baby it's up to you,
It's whatever you like
I'm not the most romantic guy in the world, but what the hell kind of date is that? Is he trying to convince her to go out with him, or scare her away? Where do you pick up a girl who would enjoy going on a date to the ghetto? He's probably scouring the female pen looking for girls up for parole. There's no visit like a conjugal visit.
It's also funny because the date starts off at a resort or something. They're sipping pina colladas, laughing, giggling and having a good time. Next thing you know, they're dodging bullets. The girl signed up for a date, not a section 8 aerobics class taught by 15 year-olds with automatic weapons. When I'm on a date, I don't want to run from anything but the rain. I'm not trying to get all hot and sweaty and forever be dubbed the sweaty-date guy.
The most ridiculous part of the song is that he poses the whole scenario as a question. He's asking her if she wants to go to a resort and drink umbrella drinks, or to the hood and get shot at. What the hell kind of question is that? It's not like asking if she wants Olive Garden or Chilli's. It's not like proposing the movies or the arcade. It's more like choosing between living or dying. Isn't that question a little too deep for a first date? Would you rather spend the day jumping in the pool, or jumping fences? Wait, before you answer, keep this in mind; if we really get lucky we might end up in the hospital, or maybe even a jail cell. Baby it's up to you. It's whatever you like.
Retarded.
The sad part is, people write songs because of things that go on in their lives. The question that's begging to be asked here is if he's actually proposed this scenario to a girl. What's even more depressing is somebody is in their car right now bobbing their head to this song. There is somebody out there who says, "ooh, this is my jam" when it comes on in the club.
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