Hey Sam, lemme get a shot of Jack with that booty clap.

I drive by this strip club everyday and I wanted to put these pictures up. Sorry if they look bad. I took them in a hurry from my car because the valet guy kept looking at me. The fact that I was sitting creepily in a strip club parking lot with a digital camera probably had something to do with it. I could've been anybody from a disgruntled husband/boyfriend to a private detective, or just a stalker. Sidebar.
What exactly does this mean? Are they telling me that Sam Malone, "Woody" Boyd, Norm Peterson, Cliff Clavin and Frasier Crane are in there? If so, they're a long way from home. I was a little younger when Cheers was out, but even in my adolescence I was thinking, damn, this show is good, but it's missing something. Now I finally know what it was. It was scattered ass--thongs, naked girls, lap dances and dolla, dolla bills y'all. It was right there in front of my face the whole time and I never realized it. Cliff should've been making it rain like Pacman Jones.
Maybe they mean it's an inviting environment (what strip club isn't). Everybody knows that sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name. Is that a good thing? There's only a couple reasons why somebody would know your name in a strip club: you're in there too much, you spend too much money, or you got a little too touchy-feely one time and got thrown out like Jazz on the Fresh Prince. Those all involve the word too much, and too much is never good. I don't want everybody to know my name in a strip joint. I want to be nameless and faceless.
Yes, I know making your way in the world today takes everything you got. And takin' a break from all your worries sure would help alot. Yeah, I would like to get away. I can think of a thousand places to get away that won't leave me smelling like cigarettes and baby oil. Yeah, the lunch and dinner menu may not be as good, but at least I won't leave covered in glitter. Bottom line, if I ever saw Rhea Pearlman stripping, I would probably gouge my eyes out. Lilith was pretty hot, though.

girls with ambition

I don' t know if you've heard of T-Pain. He's the R&B singer whose computerized/synthesized voice is a regular feature in every song at the top of the charts. His voice is so synthesized that I don't know if he can actually sing. He sounds like what your computer would if it could sing. His first hit song is called, "I'm In Love With A Stripper"--a fine little ditty about his affinity for dancers and the clubs they dance in (we've al been there, literally). I won't lie, it's kinda catchy. The song he has out now is called "Bartender". This song is about his desire to date the female bartender at a club (been here before, too). I'm staring to see a pattern. T-Pain seems to like women with jobs--preferably in the service industry. I have no problem with that. I encourage dating women with ambition, but is he going to write a song about every one of his girlfriends with a career? I guess his next hit will be, "Bag My Groceries Girl"?.