Spartan workout plan

I saw 300 about a week ago. I need to get on the spartan workout plan. I wonder how the spartans had access to ab-rollers so early. I know that Sparta was probably a self-sufficient territory and the men probably did a great deal of backbreaking work, but come on. There was not one of them who was even a little overweight. Not even a pudge. I guess they were doing crunches between picking the fields and shoeing the horse. I can't imagine how they had time for cardio.

parents just don't understand

I was talking to a girl the other day. She was all excited about prom and her dress and she started describing it. I asked her if the dress had a split or something in it and her mom, who was sitting across the table said, "Oh no no no. Momma don't do splits in dresses for 17 year-olds." I thought that was odd coming from the same woman who allows her daughter to have parties in her house when she is not home. I guess she's one of those mom's who thinks that as long as you do it at my house it's ok. What does a dress with a split in it do that's not being done at a house party with no adult supervision? She even buys the beer. They're going to do it anyway, right? That's crazy logic. You're going to facilitate underage drinking because kids are going to do it anyway. Let's buy them weed and condoms too. I mean, they're going to do it anyway. But please, please, don't buy them dresses with splits in them. That's just outragous. In fact, I'm starting a petition to lower the drinking age to 14 and raise the no-slits-in-dress age to 20. I am also going to teach a class warning parents of the dangers of dresses with slits. Last week a boy broke his nose after he ran into a locker door because he was paying more attention to a girl with a slit in her skirt than where he was going.

how NOT to get a girl

I recommend, more like urge, guys to be be friends with as many girls as possible if you want to figure out how to get girls. You may not ever get with your girl-friends, but you will get valuable information on what NOT to do to get a girl. I was out the other night with some friends, most of them being girls, and they were telling me some of the things guys say to try and woo them. We've all heard the lines about being the most beautiful girl in the bar and about how much money you make, but I heard a new one. A guy walked up to one of the girls I was with and after having a short conversation slipped the girl his number and said, "Gimme a call sometime. I'm a hairstylist and I'll do your hair for free." I can think of a number of things that are wrong with that statement. The first thing being, and excuse me for generalizing, but most male "hairstylists" are gay. I know, I know, some of them aren't, but I would think telling a girl that you'll do her hair for free is as much an invitation for a gay friend as it is a pick-up line. She may call you, but it will have a whole lot to do with getting free hairdo's and less to do with your sparkling personality. Girls do stuff like that. If a girl would go out with a guy she has no interest in to get a free meal, imagine what she would do for a free coloring. Probably alot, but not what you're thinking. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with being a male hairstylest, or if you are one that you're gay, but I don't know if it's neccessarily a pick-up line. You may not want to mention that right off the bat unless it just comes up in conversation. If the hairstylest line is in your bag-o-lines, I think it is best that you remove it. You'll find yourself helping her shop for panties instead of getting in them.